154. Hope Is Not a Strategy

by | Jun 29, 2023

Hope is a double-edged sword.

It feels amazing – but often these good vibes, by themselves, lull us into a false sense of action (hoping things will change) or despair (that they won’t).

Either way… nothing changes for the better because hope isn’t a strategy.

I like to think of hope as more as a guide.

If you want to really move the needle you have to know how to turn your hopes and dreams to make a difference or reach a goal into strategy!

I share all the details inside this episode.

I’ll see you there. xo, Janeen

>> CLICK HERE to Watch on YouTube

TRANSCIPTION:

[00:00:00] Janeen: Well, hey there you guys. Welcome back to another week, another episode of the podcast on becoming the CEO of your life. I am Janeen Alley, and we are talking about hope this week and how hope is amazing, but it’s not a strategy. So if you are brand new to my world, welcome. I think a lot of you really, really loved the podcast that I did last week on Why Mindset. I was kind of surprised at how much positive feedback I got from that. Again, just because these are things that I talk about and things that I know and I forget sometimes that this is not second nature to most of you, and so I’m really grateful that I did that episode. If there is something that you want

[00:00:43] to learn about or you want me to talk about, I would love to get some podcast ideas from you. Maybe even have you on the podcast as a guest, if that is something that really resonates with you and you wanna share your message on a platform to get your message out into the [00:01:00] world. So if any of that sounds good to you please reach out to me. I’m really easy to get ahold of. you can DM me on any of the social platforms. You can send me an email, whatever. I think when we are thinking about becoming the CEOs of our lives, there are things that we have on our heart and ways that we wanna make a difference in the world. If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve probably heard me say this at some point. But I truly believe that each one of us has a special spark to share with the world, something that is unique to us that has never been seen before on the face of the planet, and you might be doing something similar to what somebody else is doing, but no one is doing it your way. Buckminster Fuller said something very similar to this.

[00:01:45] He said, "everyone has the perfect gift to give the world. And if each of us is freed to give the gift that is uniquely ours to give, the world will be in total harmony." And I a hundred percent [00:02:00] agree with this, and I believe that it is our job to find that and to pursue that passion because it really does create that harmony, but it also brings meaning to our lives in a way that nothing else can.

[00:02:13] So I am here to support you in creating that vision for your life and to create something and to turn that idea into something that is tangible in the way that you want to make a difference in your world, whether it’s in your family or whether it’s in your community, or whether in it’s in the world at large.

[00:02:34] I am somebody who loves to dream. I would consider myself a visionary. I love creators. I love dreamers, and there are a lot of amazing things about our planet, but there are some things that definitely need to change. So I have a little rock on my desk with the words hope on it.

[00:02:52] So that’s what we’re gonna be talking about today is hope. Hope is an emotion and it feels amazing and [00:03:00] all of us hope for good things to come. hope feels very similar to me to anticipation. And it’s an amazing experience to hope for something or anticipate something in our future that we get really excited about.

[00:03:14] You don’t even have to take the vacation, for example, if you’re just thinking about taking the vacation or anticipating the vacation. That is part of the fun. I would say the anticipation and the hope of the vacation and something that’s on the horizon for you that you’re hoping for is just as exciting and just as fun as the actual experience.

[00:03:35] And sometimes it’s even more so because when you’re hoping and anticipating for the actual event, you’re not tired or jet lagged, or you have crying kids in tow or whatever the reality of the actual vacation is. Am I right? Come on. I know some of you are with me on that. But you can get excited about going even without leaving the house, and that part of it is really fun.

[00:03:58] I’m gonna see my [00:04:00] son in August. He has been on a mission for two years. I haven’t seen him in person for two years. I’ve seen him on video every week since he is been gone. But the hope of seeing him again is incredible. Sometimes I get emotional just thinking about it like I kind of am doing right now.

[00:04:18] But the anticipation of our time together and seeing all the places in Portugal that he has been to and that he has seen and has touched his life is so exciting to me. Even though it hasn’t happened yet, and as someone who believes in dreams and visions and change, this is something that keeps me going is the hope that I can create something that will truly change the world. Especially on days that feel frustrating and really long when I’ve got a lot of tech difficulties or

[00:04:47] I’ve just been procrastinating or whatever it is, but hope renews that fire within me to keep going and to keep reaching for my dreams and striving even when it feels [00:05:00] hard. You might be feeling currently, some hope in your life. Hope that something will get better, hope that you might be able to change maybe there’s some habits that you want to incorporate into your life. Or maybe you hope to make a difference in the world in your own way. So that your life feels purposeful. I think that going for the dream and creating that for ourselves really does increase our quality of life. And it means so much. I mean, these are the things that get us excited to get out of bed every day and it changes our life experience.

[00:05:35] I think we all hope things will change in the world for the better. I know my kids, for example, hope that someone will come along and do their dishes, right. Wouldn’t that be nice? Right. We have a little dish fairy. They can continue to hope for that, all the live long day and that will not come to fruition.

[00:05:53] Right? We don’t have one of those in our house, but hope does feel amazing when we, [00:06:00] I feel like, are hoping for things in particular that create a better world for us all. This is the only time I feel like I am the killer of my kids’ dreams when I let them know that there isn’t a dish fairy. Just so you know.

[00:06:14] But hope can sometimes create a double-edged sword for us in our lives. Hope can be a blessing and it can also be a curse at the same time, because if all we’re doing is sitting around hoping, it feels good, but nothing changes, right? Because hope is not a strategy.

[00:06:35] I’m gonna say that one more time. Hope is not a strategy. It feels amazing, but in order to keep that fire going, in order to keep that fire lit, we have to take action. Otherwise, the things that we are hoping for don’t come to fruition, and we end up swinging the pendulum all the way over the other way where we end up feeling hopeless.

[00:06:57] One of the things that I truly believe in [00:07:00] is that I take action like it all depends on me, but I pray in a way that it all depends on God. If you are a person of faith, let Him guide you. He does that when we take action. It feels more like a partnership when I am taking action and checking in and course correcting as I’m moving forward.

[00:07:21] One of the things that I’ve mentioned before on the podcast, it’s kind of one of my mantras in life, is that motion breeds clarity. Even if you don’t have a belief in God, you can still believe that this happens because I think that we can sense that we are guided by some other force outside of ourselves, whether we consider that God or the universe or whatever.

[00:07:42] As you move forward, you’re gathering data about what works and what doesn’t work, and you’re gaining insight on that. And it’s much easier for us to be guided and led when we have that information instead of just sitting and hoping [00:08:00] things are going to change.

[00:08:02] The hopes we have can be a guide for change. So, I want to say that one more time. The hopes that we have, I feel like are on purpose. They can be a guide for us as far as what actions to take in order to make the world a better place. So I want you thinking about this for a moment. What are some of the things that you hope for? Let me give an example of this. I walk my dog every single day, and I’ve noticed particularly this year that there is a lot of trash in my neighborhood. And I live in a very beautiful area, and I’ve been kind of surprised at how much trash I see. And I’m seeing this more and more not just in my neighborhood, but kind of around my community.

[00:08:44] And one of the things that I really believe, Is that quote from Gandhi, be the change that you wanna see in the world. So I have just decided, hey, this is my chance. This is my chance. I can be the change. And so can you. And so when I go out for walks with my dog, I [00:09:00] carry a garbage bag with me so that I can clean up my neighborhood.

[00:09:04] I take that responsibility on because this is where I live and this is what I want to see as something that’s different. This is the hope that I have for my community is that it’s clean. Instead of just hoping it’s going to go away, I’m taking action on that. I’m letting that hope guide my decisions and guide my actions to change.

[00:09:27] But you might be wanting to take action on a much bigger scale. Some of you feel like you have something bigger that you feel called to do. And I know that this calling feels different for everyone. Some people get really excited about a calling that they feel as far as the changes that they wanna see in the world, maybe it’s building a well in a community or maybe building a school. Some people get upset or frustrated or worried with the circumstance, like for example, the diminishing rainforest or [00:10:00] climate change or something. Some people get angry, like when they’re thinking about sex trafficking or abuse in the world they get angry and that spurs them to change. Some people feel compassion when they’re thinking about refugees or people who don’t have a place to live in their communities, they might be spurred on by that emotion. So I want you paying attention to all of these emotions that come up. You’re hoping that things are going to be different, and yet you’re feeling all of these other emotions that are also kind of in congruence with this hope that you feel for the world, whether it’s your immediate community or somewhere that feels further away. I have clients who own businesses, and this is one of the ways that they create change in their world. I work with women who have written books and developed curriculum. I work with women who are seeking a personal development venture, like losing weight or becoming more grounded and present and less [00:11:00] scatterbrained in their lives.

[00:11:01] All of these things I think are so important because they’re either getting us ready to go out and work in the world. I mean, we can’t work if we’re feeling unwell or tired all the time, right? So we need to first take the steps to feel better, then we can go out and make a change. But so often what happens when we’re feeling these promptings to make a change in our communities, we talk ourselves out of it.

[00:11:29] We never move past hope. We just hope things will get better, and that’s the end of the conversation. So today what I wanna do is I want you to turn your hope into action. I want you thinking about the things that you hope for, the things that you’re wishing were different in your lives without it being this all encompassing thing.

[00:11:53] I’m gonna talk about that in just a second, but I want you really thinking about, okay, I. If I was the [00:12:00] catalyst for change, what would that look like in my life? And I’m gonna help you here because there are some actions that we need to take to take those hopes and those beautiful ideas that we have, and turn them into something concrete. Something that we could turn around and say, I did that.

[00:12:18] I was the one that created that. So the first thing is you wanna get really clear on what you hope for. What is it that you want? One of the things that can help you to get clarity on this, because our primitive brain often swoops in, it’s just like, well, you can’t do that, or You don’t have the resources for that, or whatever.

[00:12:37] But I want you imagining if you had all the resources at your fingertips, what would you want to change? This is the truth. You have an infinite capacity to create and to collaborate and to contribute. I don’t want you downplaying or talking yourself out of [00:13:00] your dream or the hopes that you have for a better world. We need you. We need your gifts. The current world that we live in has to change in order for this to be a sustainable place for us to live for our children and our children’s children.

[00:13:16] And on now on the line. We have to make a change. And if you’re feeling called To step into a different role to make that change, we need to listen. Now is the time to really listen. So the second step is to build confidence, not in a way that you’re used to. Okay. Oftentimes when we’re thinking about confidence, we’re thinking about, well, have I done that before?

[00:13:40] And has it been successful? Stop focusing on your weaknesses, and I want you to think about starting to focus on your strength. And in fact, the podcast that’s coming next week is all about building your confidence and how to do this. So I want you taking a look at what you are good at and let [00:14:00] go of getting it right.

[00:14:01] We get so hung up on the details of things and it stops us from moving forward. One of the things that I learned early on in my coaching career, this is actually the way that I found Brooke Castillo I was listening to a podcast with Amy Porterfield and she had Brooke on as her guest, and I feel like I really resonate with Amy and the things that I create and the things that I do, I do want them to look

[00:14:26] beautiful. I want my clients to have a very professional experience when they work with me and Brooke got on the podcast. And she has built this incredible business, and one of the things that she said on the podcast was, B minus work is good enough. And it blew me away. I wasn’t super familiar with Brooke’s work at the time, but I’m like, I don’t think I can do that.

[00:14:48] But the way that Amy was responding to Brooke and the things that she was saying, the aha moments that she had had with this idea that B minus work was good enough, I thought, well, maybe I can start [00:15:00] applying that. And the truth is, is when you put something out there, it’s never going to be the way that it’s going to be a year or six months down the road because you learn as you have these conversations with people. Interestingly enough.

[00:15:17] I mentioned in the last several podcasts that things have changed in my business drastically over the last six months or so. I was even just reading some copy that I had created for social media like a month ago, and I was like, wow, wow. Things are totally different. I feel this message differently than I did a month ago, and I can tell, and the reason why is because I keep tweaking it.

[00:15:40] I keep talking about it, I keep getting feedback from it, and I keep reaching out to people and talking about the things that I do. Now, Brooke, I have to tell you, Brooke has got this book. It was one of the very first things that she put out, and it’s called, if I’m So Smart, why Can’t I lose weight? It’s something along those lines.

[00:15:56] And I actually have a copy of that book in my closet. And when [00:16:00] I first got it, one of the things that I noticed about the book, now this is after I listened to Brooke on this interview, one of the things that I noticed was there were a lot of grammatical errors and typos in this book. And she mentioned this on Amy’s podcast.

[00:16:13] She said, yeah, there’s a lot of people that email me. And it’s like, you know what? This book is horribly written and I, I can’t believe that you put this out there in the world, but she said those comments paled in comparison to all the notes that she got back from people that said, this book changed my life.

[00:16:30] And that’s the thing that I want you to keep in mind and remember. The message that you have to share right now is never gonna touch someone unless you put it out there. And so often we get caught in the weeds and in the details of doing something.

[00:16:45] And in our fear of putting something out there because we don’t feel confident, and I’m telling you that confidence comes from doing something. It actually comes from taking action and getting better at it. And like I said, the episode that I’m gonna do just on [00:17:00] confidence is coming next week. So this is something that you struggle with,

[00:17:03] I want you to stay tuned and put a pin in it for next week. So I’m just gonna touch on this one briefly. I’ve got a whole nother episode coming just on how to build confidence next week. Okay. The third thing that I wanna talk about is you want to focus on making a sustainable impact. And when I mean sustainable, I mean steadily working Toward the goal without burning yourself out. It is so important for us to put certain systems in place to support us in these missions because these missions, depending on what it is that you’re doing, and depending on how long you wanna do it, I mean it can last for years. But not only that, you want to be able to create the freedom in your life to do the things that matter most.

[00:17:52] Most people think that freedom is the means for us to keep our options open and to stay [00:18:00] loose and to stay available. But what this does is it does give us a little space temporarily, for sure. Eventually what happens when we’re in this head space of wanting to keep our options open and have the leisure time that we want to, to do the things that matter to us, it ends up becoming its own prison because we end up not committing to anything. We never choose. We never decide what’s important. Wishy, washiness is not freedom. You’re unattached. You never really discover your call or your mission or your destiny because you are afraid to fully commit. We get stuck in this fear of like, well, I don’t wanna be trapped in doing this thing, or I don’t wanna be tied down to this thing.

[00:18:49] But when you really are fully committed to something that you feel passionate about, it does the opposite. It lights you up. And this is what I feel like makes life really [00:19:00] exciting and worth living is because you do feel called to do something that is going to make a difference in your life, in the life of your family members, in the life of your community, or even in the world.

[00:19:12] And people might be afraid to choose because they’re thinking, what if I changed my mind? Then you change your mind. But you’ll never know that you need to change your mind unless you commit in the first place. You’ve got to try things out to know, okay, this isn’t my path. And then you pivot, and then you pivot, until you land on the thing that is your thing, and that is what makes life super exciting.

[00:19:40] So one of the things in creating a sustainable impact is you need to be mindful that you don’t burn out. I think we waffle between going all in and feeling super gung-ho and not taking good care of ourselves and we don’t do anything else besides that thing.

[00:19:55] And then swinging the pendulum over the other way to procrastinating, to the point where [00:20:00] your idea fizzles and dies and you don’t move forward consistently. And all that the idea does is it stays an idea. And it stays in your past instead of moving forward into the present and then into your future. So you want to find this workable balance between play and work and mission and family and the change that you want to create in the world.

[00:20:26] One of the things that Lynn Twist says when it comes to creating an impact in the world is you wanna be able to see that the way that things are going need to shift. I mentioned this just a minute ago. The way that the world is currently structured is not sustainable, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that it needs to be a hard stop.

[00:20:48] She says you want a hospice old ways to a point until they are gone. It is a loving way to allow and feel compassionate about the [00:21:00] way that we’re currently living our lives and compassionate about all the people who have created some incredible inventions in the world that are just not going to be sustainable moving into the future.

[00:21:11] And then at the same time, we want a midwife this new way of life into the world in a way that it becomes prolific in a way that becomes sustainable and it really is you. You’re able to live out this dream that you have and leave the world, a better place after you’re gone.

[00:21:30] You don’t want this project to become an all consuming project from hustle, right? We definitely want a hospice hustle in our lives, but we want to be able to be creators from this place of love, and that is the way that we do it. So if this is what you want in your life, if you want to be able to make your dreams come true, and to make your dreams become a reality and truth be told, This is what we need.

[00:21:55] We need your dreams and we need your ideas. I want to invite [00:22:00] you to learn how to do this and becoming the CEO of your life to truly live the dream and to truly make an impact. So if you wanna join me, I wanna invite you into this mastermind that I’m putting together that’s starting in October.

[00:22:15] It’s starting on the 10th of October, and I want you to be there. So if that sounds amazing to you, I want you to go to janeenalley.com/breakthrough in order to connect with me and to find out if you’re a good fit for this group. So if that sounds amazing to you, I want you to go to janeenalley.com/breakthrough to join me.

[00:22:37] All right, my friends, that is what I have for you today. I hope you have an incredible rest of your day. We will talk to you soon. See ya. Bye.

 

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